Wednesday, September 29, 2010

Touch: The Litmus Test of Flirting

You are on a date and although he's really making sparks fly for you, you are not sure if it's the same for him.  He smiles when you speak, you are both laughing, and you seem to be hitting it off.  But this scenario has played itself out before.  You think the date is going well, but somehow you both never reconnect for a second one.

How can you tell whether he's really interested in you because he is attracted to you, or because he really enjoys being with you, but more as a friend than anything else?

Give him the touch test.

Touch your date and see how comfortable he is with it.  Then wait to see whether he responds back or not.  If he doesn't find an excuse to reciprocate, it's probably safe to assume you have just made a new friend.  If he does,  you are definitely going in his little black book (hopefully he erases all the other names in it at the same time). 

Here are some ways to naturally and easily get that contact:

  • Grab his arm as you make your way through the crowd at your favorite bar, restaurant, movie line-up.
  • Let your knees, thighs, arms, or foot casually press  up against his when you sit next to or across from him.
  • Leave your hand next to his on the restaurant table.  Say something positive about his hand and gently touch it with your finger as if to show him what you mean (e.g. "Wow, do you ever have big hands/long fingers").
  • When standing close to him, touch him on his shoulder or back as you lean in closely to speak to him.

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